You wanted me to come of a free will which you would not let me exercise. It was so great it seemed to be outside me, while inside I felt deadly calm. How do you know? I can't explain; I simply feel it to be the truth. I think it's quite incredible.
I feel perfect—as if I shall never feel tired or hungry again. There were trees, roofs black against the horizon, the deep rumble of a train. I think that is sick, Ilona. Oh—to keep Karl away from Edward? And away from Madeleine, I think.
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